Get off my lawn, whippersnappers!

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Get off my lawn, whippersnappers!

Post by Vergil on Wed Dec 19, 2012 4:22 pm

Have I really gotten to the age where I'm absolutely bitter and hate just about everyone? Earlier today on my way to lunch I was deliberately cut off by some thundercunt driving an ugly yellow bug, and it turns out we were both headed to Subway. As this living glass of rectal juice walked out of her car, it turns out she's your average spoiled teenager of the younger generation. How wonderful. People who think they're entitled to do whatever they want just because they scored off the genetic lottery are pretty high up on my list of the things I hate. Right above slugs and snails. Fuck those creatures, I can't stand them. Even more news, she tells the worker she's a vegetarian. OOOOOOOOOH, NOW THESE PEOPLE HAVE MORALS, I'MMA SO SCARED! Just wanted to eat a fucking porterhouse steak in front of this bitch, I could only imagine the kind of Facebook status she'd post.

"LOL just cut off an asian guy in traffic. who cares their bad drivers anyway. YOLO

~10 minutes ago via mobile"

Note: Yes, I intentionally put their instead of they're, that's how cynical I am.

Just wanted to get this off my chest.

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Re: Get off my lawn, whippersnappers!

Post by Zerifachias on Wed Dec 19, 2012 7:12 pm

Vergil wrote:...thundercunt driving an ugly yellow bug

+1 respect

Vergil wrote:As this living glass of rectal juice walked out of her car, it turns out she's your average spoiled teenager of the younger generation.

+1 respect, and I am also stealing that insult.

Vergil wrote:Even more news, she tells the worker she's a vegetarian. OOOOOOOOOH, NOW THESE PEOPLE HAVE MORALS, I'MMA SO SCARED! Just wanted to eat a fucking porterhouse steak in front of this bitch...

+2 respect. I would have done it. I would have gone to the nearest shop that sold steak, cooked it, and brought it back to the place so I could eat it in front of her face. Sloppily. Extremely sloppily.

Or at least gotten a sub with only meat, hold the bread.

Vergil wrote:...I could only imagine the kind of Facebook status she'd post.

"LOL just cut off an asian guy in traffic. who cares their bad drivers anyway. YOLO

~10 minutes ago via mobile"

Note: Yes, I intentionally put their instead of they're, that's how cynical I am.

That about sums up the dumbassery of teenagers these days. To be quite honest, I'm annoyed that I'm within 5 years of most of these people.

Also, +1 respect.

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Re: Get off my lawn, whippersnappers!

Post by Vergil on Wed Dec 19, 2012 7:36 pm

If only there were a government mandate that issued tests to all coming-of-age kids, and any of them that prove toxic to society get euthanized. Ironically, that means in order for me to have my faith in humanity restored, a lot of humanity has to go.

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Re: Get off my lawn, whippersnappers!

Post by Zerifachias on Wed Dec 19, 2012 8:00 pm

That's typically what happens when the population increases exponentially.

People stop getting proper education.

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Re: Get off my lawn, whippersnappers!

Post by Allindur, the Lightfoot on Wed Dec 19, 2012 8:53 pm

Vergil, you have just inspired me to get more creative with my offenses. I salute you.

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Re: Get off my lawn, whippersnappers!

Post by Cerani on Wed Dec 19, 2012 10:58 pm

Vergil wrote:As this living glass of rectal juice walked out of her car, it turns out she's your average spoiled teenager of the younger generation.

That's a first one for me. Right up there with, "I don't care if it hair-lip's the pope."

Also, I couldn't agree with you more. Well, I probably could, but that would require me getting a little homicidal.

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Re: Get off my lawn, whippersnappers!

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